A blog about a French horn player's journey with Focal Embouchure Dystonia; one of the only existing documentations of rehabilitation through videos and writing spanning over a decade. This blog shares resources, research, and information on FTSED and other music performance related injuries. Katie also advocates awareness, education, does presentations, provides guidance; and brings the musicians dystonia community together thru online groups, streamed interviews and conversation.
Showing posts with label Recordings. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Recordings. Show all posts
Thursday, March 7, 2019
The Phoenix Project: Rise from the Ashes by Ashley Gulbranson (French Horn)
This amazing recital in March was hosted by French horn player Ashley Gulbranson at the University of Colorado Boulder. I really wanted to attend it in person because I travel to Boulder for perforamances almost every year, since it's not that far away.
This recital in particular was significant! It features new works created for musicians recovering from Focal Dystonia. The first compositions of this kind to exist!! I did however get to watch the live stream which I posted below.
Though I don't know anyone from the project directly since it's been years since I was a student at CU-Boulder, I can't explain how exciting and heart warming this initiative is. Having this disorder is a difficult, unnerving, and solitary journey at times, even if you know others who can relate.
I know a lot of blood, sweat, and tears probably went into this substantial DMA work. Please have a listen, especially if you are a horn player with embouchure dystonia.
Link to the video recording of the recital:
https://www.facebook.com/ashley.gulbranson/videos/10156558376583705/UzpfSTEwMDAyOTAyNzk0NzM4NDoxODI0Njc0NzYwNjQxODM/
Tuesday, February 13, 2018
Rehabilitation Video Journals Updated
Just stopping by to update my inventory of videos over rehabilitation (you can see the whole inventory here: https://focalembouchuredystonia.blogspot.com/search/label/Practice%20Journal .... There's a couple over the last few years I haven't added on here and needed to. Just wanted to start it off with a before vs after video first to show the progress over the years. :-)
Before I got dystonia 2006-2009: I don't have many recordings except for from 2006-2009... but tried to smash a few excerpts together to show a bit of my abilities.
During height of Dystonia and right before diagnosed with it: 2011/2012:....first video of playing in January of 2011, and there was a lot I was too embarrassed to put on camera. But I had been trying to recover my playing since June 2010. The 2-4 videos are of taking an inventory of my symptoms at the time in 2012.
After: Fast-forward to January 2017 ....this is a video of me warming up before teaching lessons. I'm testing the waters and checking to see how my embouchure felt. I recovered a great deal from 2011-2013.
I stopped rehabilitation practice from 2014-2015 due to graduate school, and 2015-2017 due to focusing on teaching. I didn't necessarily stop playing, I just didn't focus on recovery efforts as much or logging things.
Now in 2017 I started focusing on regaining the last percentage of my playing again and started taking some gigs! :-)
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Before I got dystonia 2006-2009: I don't have many recordings except for from 2006-2009... but tried to smash a few excerpts together to show a bit of my abilities.
During height of Dystonia and right before diagnosed with it: 2011/2012:....first video of playing in January of 2011, and there was a lot I was too embarrassed to put on camera. But I had been trying to recover my playing since June 2010. The 2-4 videos are of taking an inventory of my symptoms at the time in 2012.
After: Fast-forward to January 2017 ....this is a video of me warming up before teaching lessons. I'm testing the waters and checking to see how my embouchure felt. I recovered a great deal from 2011-2013.
I stopped rehabilitation practice from 2014-2015 due to graduate school, and 2015-2017 due to focusing on teaching. I didn't necessarily stop playing, I just didn't focus on recovery efforts as much or logging things.
Now in 2017 I started focusing on regaining the last percentage of my playing again and started taking some gigs! :-)
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Currently onto 2018.....I recorded this yesterday 02/12/18. Doing some light-touch rehabilitation. Testing how long I can hold a note out for and how lightly I can do it for. Notice how there is less spasms or involuntary flexes in the chin muscles as there were in the past.
When I start to get louder, I'm basically doing that to stretch/tense my muscles really quickly in order to relieve tension, and then diminuendo into a lighter sound when possible. My camera died, but I will film the rest of my upper register today.
March 2017: Filmed my playing on other instruments; clarinet, trumpet, trombone.
February 3rd, 2017: Playing, and speaking about my progress on larger interval jumps in rehabilitation.
July 2nd, 2016: Playing and speaking about collapsed vs puckered embouchure, tonguing vs air puffs and its affects during rehabilitation.
April 2nd, 2016: Playing and speaking about puckered vs collapsed embouchure formations in rehabilitation.
May 1st, 2014: Rehab log
January 13th, 2014: Rehab Log after acupuncture
February 17th, 2013: Rehab Log...might have already posted this under my videos.
Thursday, March 30, 2017
(Video) Focal Embouchure Dystonia and Playing Other Instruments
When you have musician's dystonia, a lot of friends and colleagues try to encourage you to find another instrument. Let me tell you, that isn't easy, and for a number of reasons. First being...nothing can come close to the love you have for your primary instrument. For me, horn is the best, and everything else doesn't come close. Not that I haven't given other instruments a shot. I grew up learning multiple instruments. Guitar is my second love, and it also doesn't come close to horn.
I enjoy practicing on other instruments, and I have to because I'm a teacher! However, my embouchure dystonia still effects me on other instruments to a certain degree. Some instruments are easier to play (i.e. trumpet, flute), and other instruments harder (i.e. tuba, trombone, euphonium). But just because some of the instruments are easier to play, doesn't mean I have the chops to master the instrument even if I wanted to.
I want to show you what my embouchure looks like when I play other instruments. I don't talk much in the videos; except on the trumpet and trombone one. I think it is good to show how my focal dystonia still effects my playing from instrument to instrument. I can still play to a certain degree on each instrument, but only if I focus on less tension....which means a more relaxed embouchure formation, and not stabilized at all. I show this really well on the trumpet video and explain it in detail.
Let me know what you think of my new blog layout (should I go back to the previous design?), and if these videos give any insight. I'm not sure if these videos can show much...but I still think it's important to post them and analyze them, as not many people post recordings of themselves playing other related-instruments while having focal embouchure dystonia! :-)
(Clarinet)
(oboe)
(Trumpet)
(Trombone)
Tuesday, February 11, 2014
Laughter Is Everything!
I originally posted this on 12/29/2012, but the video never worked. So I decide to re-post it. Hopefully works now! I wanted to share something from the past! While on orchestra tour in Chicago in 2009, we were eating at Giordano's, and I was goofing around buzzing through a paper wrapper. The string players around me were trying to figure out how I produced a buzz, so I was teaching them, and we ended up buzzing some excerpts...but they thought I should do a solo excerpt and they'd sing along to Beethoven 5 (we had just finished watching the Chicago Symphony perform Beethoven 5 that night). As you can tell, my horn colleague to the right of me is looking at me like I'm crazy!
Monday, May 14, 2012
Conversations: Mark Denekas
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| A picture of Mark in his youth. |
It seems
like forever ago that I spoke with Mark Denekas about Focal Task Specific
Embouchure Dystonia. Talking to him was so important for me because he is
someone I look up to and can relate to as a hornist. First off, here is a bit
of bio about him beforehand. I also posted a clip of his playing with the
Denver Symphony at the end of this blog, it is very moving and inspiring.
Mark
retired in 1997 from the Colorado Symphony after experiencing Embouchure Dystonia
symptoms that gradually heightened. He held the principal horn position longer
than anyone in the orchestra's history:
As
a junior in high school Mark was accepted as a student by Dale Clevenger, the
newly appointed principal horn of the Chicago Symphony. While in high school he performed as
principal horn with the Youth Orchestra of Greater Chicago, winning the soloist
competition in his senior year. He was
subsequently asked to perform on Louis Sudler’s Artist Showcase, on Chicago
Public Television. He was one of the
only high school students selected to play in the Civic Orchestra of Chicago,
the training orchestra of the Chicago Symphony.
Mark attended Carnegie Mellon University where he continued his horn
studies with Forrest Standley. In the
summer following his sophomore year Mark was selected as Principal horn with
the Colorado Philharmonic, now known as the National Repertory Orchestra. There
he gave his first performance of the Second Horn Concerto of Richard Strauss.
The following year he was appointed the principal horn of Chicago’s Grant Park
Symphony, where he performed for the next five summers and was featured as
soloist with Gliere’s Horn Concerto. His
professional status now firmly established, Mark was engaged as an extra and substitute
player with both the Chicago and Pittsburgh Symphony Orchestras. He graduated with honors (Phi Kappa Phi) from
CMU with degrees in Horn Performance and Music Education.
Following
graduation Mark’s career rapidly unfolded with contracts with the New Jersey
Symphony, the Chicago Lyric Opera, the Winnipeg Symphony, and the Pittsburgh
Symphony. During the early years of his
career Mark was privileged to continue his studies with Philip Farkas, the
great former principal horn with the Chicago Symphony. He also studied with the legendary tuba
player Arnold Jacobs, whose knowledge of pulmonary physiology (lung function)
and symphonic and operatic repertoire made him the highly sought after coach of
many professional wind and brass players and vocalists. In September of 1974
Mark became the principal horn with the Denver Symphony which later became the
Colorado Symphony Orchestra. Here he was
one of the most frequently featured soloists. Once established as the leading
horn player in the Rocky Mountain region, he was invited to perform outside of
Colorado as guest principal horn with the Omaha, Columbus, and Honolulu
Symphony Orchestras. At the invitation of Ling Tung, Mark was appointed
principal horn in the prestigious Grand Teton Music Festival.
In
Colorado his teaching career also flourished with students ranging from young
beginners to professionals performing with the Boulder and Colorado Springs
Symphonies and the military bands and orchestras. He was a charter member of the Board of
Directors which founded the Denver Young Artists Orchestra. DYAO quickly became
the outstanding performance opportunity for serious young musicians in
Colorado. As part of the Colorado Symphony Residency programs, Mark gave master
classes and clinics throughout the state. He was a part time lecturer in horn
studies at both CU and UNC. After retiring, Mark has become registered in all
levels of Suzuki Training, and has established one of the leading Suzuki piano
studios in Southeast Denver.
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I
was fortunate enough to contact Mark through a former horn student of his that
is now attending Peabody Conservatory. I spoke to Mark about what I was
experiencing and asked about his experience and advice on Embouchure Dystonia.
One
of the first things we talked about was the importance of relieving the stress
from all the demands that are often placed on us, letting go, and switching to
a different mind-frame than what we've been schooled on. Training, studying,
and performing music requires a much different mind-frame (focused on
technique) and physical approach (focused on mastering difficult repertoire,
breathing, meeting demands and working harder) than that which is required for
rehabilitation. This is our mental hurdle in rehabilitation.
In
rehabilitation, if we are to use any form of analytical thinking, it can't be
used to analyze or criticizing ones skills, techniques, sound, etc. ....it
should be focused on awareness of tension that exists in our embouchure and
fully embracing it, working with it, not against it. Mark stated that you have
to relax your mind first so you can be more attuned to what's going on
physically. This is so true! He said that this state of mind should be
peaceful....you should enjoy playing your horn (even with involuntary muscle
contractions and all). This is the first step: embracing it all, loving it,
enjoying it, a positive attitude/self-esteem no matter how you sound...once you
get past that then you can start focusing on your body/physical recovery .
The next thing Mark spoke about is the importance of learning to separate our worth from our instrument before we can start physical rehabilitation. This is our emotional hurdle in rehabilitation. This is similar to the issue that Denver Dill brings up in his book, learning to completely let go of the ego. [So much of our success on our instrument starts to define who we are and becomes too intertwined; this is especially often true the more you excel or succeed and are rewarded for it - winning competitions, auditions, awards, etc. We forget why we do what we love, it becomes about depending on external praise and rewards, trying to keep up with the successful streak, RATHER than focusing on internal enjoyment and love of what we do - no matter where we do it, or at what level of playing we are at. Without a doubt such a huge setback forces us to question and remember why we love our instrument/what we do....it enlightens us.
It's also similar to my views and how important it is to treat success and failure as one and the same. All musicians are blessed with "the gift of music" or "creative calling", it will always remain in us, but sometimes in life we are taught or forced to see there is more than one way of sharing it; for example sometimes it comes in the form of teaching/passing on our knowledge, learning another instrument, another art or endeavor that we love, becoming passionate about another area of music like music medicine or injuries, conducting, etc. Sometimes it allows you to focus on other areas of your life like your health or family, and this in return allows you to see the bigger picture...whatever that comes to be....believe me, it is better than what we were striving for before.]
Like
Mark said, it's this huge mental and emotional hurdle we must jump over before
we can put effort into physical rehabilitation. Grieving is a huge process to
get through in time. He goes on to talk about physical rehabilitation with
Embouchure Dystonia, the exercises he does. This is our physical hurdle in
rehabilitation....
First
of all he spoke to me about being aware of tension/symptoms, where it happens,
when, and also the opposite - when it doesn't happen and where. Make it a point
to play your instrument so you can get use to building on this awareness....the
exercises help with spotting areas of tension while helping you learn how to
work your way around. Physical recovery requires working out the tension
through very basic exercises and using your awareness to make slow and subtle
changes in the way you play a specific thing. Sometimes it's not just a change
in your movements, but it can be bigger changes too in your body (ex. how you
hold your instrument, your posture, breathing, etc). But you must be relaxed in
order to do so, in order to understand how things are functioning under the
hood, to become aware of what's happening. [Also I think it helps to have
studied embouchure function at some point (ex. Farkas's 40 virtuosic
Embouchures, Farkas's Art of Brass Playing, etc. Also check out Wilketone's
Embouchure Function blog/videos]. Here are a few exercises, or aspects of
playing that Mark spoke to me about and why he does them:
1.
It's important for him to play on his leg because it allows the mouthpiece to
come to him, rather than him coming to the mouthpiece. It also gives some
stability to hold the horn this way, because playing off of the leg creates
more movement in general due to the arm trying to keep still/trying to hold the
horn stable...this just makes the embouchure even more harder to work with
because it has to additionally focus on trying to adjust to these external
movements. [This is true for me as well! I didn't think about it until now, but
I wonder if working with Pip Eastop's "Pipstick" would help with
external stability/balancing the horn as well? Especially for instruments that
don't have the option of playing on the leg.]
2.
"Always warm up" - getting good blood circulation in the embouchure
is necessary.
3.
"Don't forget to work on breathing." Even if we aren't required of
using a huge expansive breath yet for louder/stronger playing, doesn't mean our
breathing should go neglected or that it isn't important; it is another area of
rebuilding our physical well-being as a musician that needs to be addressed
during recovery, it also is a part of keeping up our physical stamina...and good-feeling
for us in general.
4.
"Don't do long tones as part of rehabilitation because they tend to lock
in faults or cause more irritation/tension in the embouchure." Don't do
them too soon/prematurely, unless you feel you've recovered and can handle
them; remember they are an intense form of training because it involves so much
stamina/endurance. Yes you want to work with your spasms/symptoms, but long
tones are not a good approach because they require so much control over your
embouchure that you haven't regained yet. Recovery requires taking baby-steps
when confronting your symptoms and making slow subtle changes.
5.
"Try to focus on a more relaxed playing if possible" - meaning not
really high, not loud...more of a free flowing feeling; soft, gentle, and slow
in the most comfortable range you can.
6.
Start on a comfortable note like middle F, of the F below that. Do light
tonguing - four groups of 16th notes. Start on a speed that you can do, and
work on slowing it down over time. Doesn't matter if fast or slower...but for
most people it's harder to do slow. This is in most cases for people with embouchure
Dystonia; they can play faster passages, but slow sustained passages are
terribly difficult. So when you practice the four groups of 16ths, for some
reason it doesn't give you embouchure enough time to spasm or jerk, it
distracts the brain from sending the wrong signal. Eventually you will be able
to slow your playing down. [Perhaps this is like a sensory-trick...a way of
tricking the brain? This exercise also reminds me of the slowing-down exercises
that helped classical guitarist Mark Ashford successfully recover from his
Focal Hand Dystonia. How amazing this is to see a similarity in approaches!]
7.
Start on the most comfortable note you can hold. Hold it, then focus working
your way into the note below it. Work on one note at a time...even if you have
to work on the same note day after day. [I do this exercise too, but I start in
my pedal register. It's not that I can't start higher and work my way down to
my middle-to-low ranger, it's that for some reason I feel working in my pedal
range requires less pressure on my lips and doesn't sap my endurance right
away, though it does require a lot deeper air, and it relaxes my face more
while giving good blood circulation, though it's also not the easiest register
to improve upon.] He also said that Max Schlossberg's Daily Trumpet Drills have
helped him out a lot.
8.
Mark said that an excerpt that is usually very difficult for horn players with
Embouchure Dystonia to play is Mussorgsky's Pictures at an Exhibition; it
reveals most symptoms associated with Embouchure Dystonia because it's in the
middle-to-low register, it is moderate to slow tempo, slurred, has some wide
intervals and lyrical....this is an excerpt that is usually very easy for horn
players as it covers our most basic abilities - what would normally be
comfortable. Therefore it is a good reference to see how you are doing every
now and then by trying to play it. Also if you do think you have Embouchure
Dystonia, this might be something you should test to see if you can play
through or not, because for most it is such a grueling challenge to get
through.
9.
Practice in a room that is large and sounds good, it will boost your
confidence/liking of your own sound. It's much better than being in a small
muffled sounding room. Also it helps you face your fears...most people are
afraid of being heard by someone because the way they are physically struggling
and how it comes to sound. [I totally agree...however, if not comfortable
playing in a larger room yet, start by practicing somewhere public like a
University practice room, then work your way to practicing in a larger
classroom, then to a stage; but always imagine someone is listening, and remind
yourself positive thoughts - that you accept and love your sound, flaws and
all, that you are doing your best and that no one has a right to judge you,
that you are doing this for yourself, for your love and passion, even for a
higher being if that is what it takes! Also for me, I found by teaching my
6th-8th grade brass playing students it helped me cope with things as well
because I had to play with them and for them...it was also humbling because we
played around the same level, yet they never judged me and thought I was the
best sounding horn player ever! It was so therapeutic to feel I was doing
something with what I love...even if I barely could play at the time.]
The
last thing Mark and I talked about was botox treatments with brass musicians
who have Embouchure Dystonia. Studies show it doesn't help a majority of brass
players with Embouchure Dystonia (it has shown improvement in Hand Dystonia
though), but he said there are some brass musician's he knows who do receive
botox injections and have had success with it. But Mark also warned about being
cautious of botox because it is still a risk even in small doses, and that it
is one of those things a person would come to rely on completely... they would
depend on it, and he can only imagine it must be like a roller coaster ride
where one probably feels relieved of their disorder temporarily until the botox
starts to wear off. It is perhaps better off without it. He also said if you
are young, take care of yourself, and remember that the body/brain can adapt,
it may be possibly heal itself in time. He also mentioned that he believes what
lead to his Embouchure Dystonia was overuse. He was diagnosed by Dr. Steven
Frucht; Dr. Frucht and horn player Glen Estrin founded Musician's With Dystonia
at the Dystonia Medical Research Foundation (DMRF).
Mark's
conversation meant a lot to me, coming from a former professional horn player
of one of my favorite orchestras! (I am also a past Colorado/UNC horn student).
His legend lives on, and I know that when I hear recordings of his playing with
the former Denver/Colorado Symphony Orchestra, his personality shines
through...and that remains with him always. Here is a recording of him! Absolutely outstanding tone and musicality!
Ravel – Pavan for a Dead Princess. Denver Symphony Orchestra; Philippe Entremont; Mark Denekas, horn solo.
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