Sunday, June 14, 2020

Where did I go on FACEBOOK?





Dear friends and family,
Did you know that facebook jail is real, and that you can be put in it for simply posting too much in one day. hahahaha! 

Well it's true, and it just happened to me! I had just started a facebook page for my Musician's Dystonia and Injury Live Talk, and made a heartfelt video for the page. I thought I'd share the video to instrumentalist groups, and not just limit it to the musicians dystonia groups. Well, that's where I made an error. Was told it will take FOREVER to get approved to get back on.

So for now I'm a sitting duck....



That's okay! I was meaning to take a break from social media this summer anyways. I believe it was a sign (and this is just my own spiritual intuition here) from above that I've been doing too much online lately with the live-streams 2-3 times a week, publishing, and who knows what else just to keep my mind off things. 

I also think it's a sign that I need to go inwards and reflect on some of the things I've been avoiding; my feelings surrounding my split and move away from my ex-fiancee back in January of 5 years; and to really think and manifest what I want my future to look like. These are all deep things and take time. Nonetheless, I am optimistic about the future and happy to be surrounded by such a supportive community and family.

I've been doing things to help boost my endorphins! Currently I purchased a kayak and did my first paddle around a gorgeous lake in the Pacific Northwest. I saw eagles, wildlife, fish, and heard children laughing, saw people camping and building fires, cooking wonderful food. I felt the breeze in my hair and enjoyed sitting in solitude out on the calm water watching the clouds and listening.

I started hiking again too! What I love about the woods here is all the trails are covered by shaded trees, moss, and always a refreshing breeze from the ocean, or a scenic view of Saint Helen or Rainer in the distance. 

Even though I still have a lot of health issues and in pain, I've decided I'm not going to let it prevent me from doing what I love...even if I have to be a little uncomfortable. I will do so as safely as I can, but I'm not going to be a vegetable any longer unless post-surgery.

My hysterectomy surgery was finally booked and officially going to happen in July. The next few weeks I'm meeting with my PCP for bloodwork, and other health-related stuff; getting my back x-rayed to make sure the pain I've been feeling is related to my uterus/ovary stuff and not something else like a herniated disc, etc. Then due for pre-op meeting and testing for COVID (i.e. a requirement now before surgery), and then all ready to go into surgery the following week. 

Still no updates on when my hernia surgery will be. Most likely sometime after healing from the hysterectomy. It was getting frustrating wondering when my surgeries are going to happen, and I started to get frustrated. I realized so much of my life is out of my control right now as far as direction, career, love, where I'll live eventually, etc....many things I'm leaving in God's hands and trusting him to guide me intuitively, and place people in my life that can help me; and so far it's been working...I feel really supported and loved despite how much I've lost this last year; with the separation, and my mothers death, and my health issues, etc. 

As for the things I can do, that's what I'm focused on; health-related activities and my several projects (more on this later!!! Exciting stuff...). I've signed up to start working with a counselor on some baggage I've been meaning to get rid of too, and my doctor helped me get into a weight loss program. I'm starting weight-loss medication and working with a nutritionist and counsler on this soon. Hiking, kayaking, being outdoors, and enjoying the summer is what I aim to do until I have to go in for surgery.

With all this said, if anyone wants to get hold of me, just e-mail me at jagd.horn@gmail.com, phone or text.

I got a new phone too, so e-mail if the number you have doesn't work and I'll give you it! 

I'm around, just floating on a kayak and spending time with family. Oh! Playing music too...my practices have been going fantastic (better than ever!!!!), and been going to brass quintet rehearsal every week. We have a few friends over every week now that Washington is in phase 3, so happy to laugh and converse with others in person again.

Much love and hugs to everyone!!

- Katie

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